Stay Connected. Stay Caring.
Thoughts on returning to community amidst the exhaustion of late stage capitalism.
I’m not sure if I have anything today.
There are many who are writing about a year of genocide, and I would draw your attention towards those writers who say important things that should be read and heard and shared.
I also want to take a moment to talk about community, its importance, and why we need to keep coming back to collective care.
Since we have moved back to the city, it has been a slow return to regular interaction with friends. It has not been predictable, but I’m happy to report that we are slowly finding our groove.
We have begun hosting a monthly potluck. Last night was our second shared meal. It has been a balm.
The youngest is now in two days a week of forest school with an amazing local organization. We did not find our community in the homeschooling network, and, frankly, I’ve given up looking there.
(If you’re struggling to connect with other homeschoolers, this is your permission to look elsewhere. Sometimes it’s not the right fit.)
He has good friends in the neighbourhood and eagerly awaits their arrival home from school. He has also connected online with unschoolers to play games together during the day. Community comes in many shapes and forms.
The oldest has started boxing two days a week. We are hopefully going to connect with some other teens for rock climbing. He fell in love with Not Back To School camp at the beginning of September and is plotting his next trip to visit folks in Vermont.
I have started reaching out to new friends to plan hangs and cute dates. It feels good. It feels a lot like what I’ve been missing.
There have also been disappointments as I’ve tried to reconnect with old friends that don’t have space in their busy lives, and that’s okay. I am sad that this world/culture/existence doesn’t leave us enough spoons/time/energy/resources to prioritize community connection. I place no blame. But there is still the sadness of letting go of the vision of reconnection that I brought back to the city with me, and I am reminded of the noble truths of Buddhist practice: attachment causes suffering, which is really just a very dramatic way to remember to stay loose and go with the flow.
I will say this though: we know that community is the answer to a lot of the crises we are facing. We know that connection to other local humans existing in the same time and space is important. We know that distributed networks of care and mutual aid are irreplaceable, especially at a time when governing bodies shift evermore towards profit motives both locally and federally. We know that the more we can have our needs met in these localized networks, the less we have to rely on international supply chains that feed systems of oppression and war. It’s all connected, folks.
If you are wiped out and exhausted, if you feel alone, if you are struggling—yes, absolutely take the time that you need to rest and repair, but also remember that you need that community connection to feel whole. Rest and repair in isolation can be damaging in itself. In fact, it often self-perpetuates exhaustion. I’d argue that what we all actually need is rest and repair in community. We need to feel cared for. We need the support of friends and family. We need to do this work together.
That’s all I have to offer for the moment. The next issue of the magazine is underway, and I’m so excited about the new contributors. Release is still a ways out, but I’ll let you all know when presales are available.
Stay well, friends. Stay connected and caring. <3
Thank you for sharing my words. And for your beautiful piece. I love the community life you're building ❤️
This is very beautiful.